Tuesday, April 25, 2023

Serendipity Made My Day

Serendipity: the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way. 

Had to do a few errands in town (Santa Fe) on Monday...get the Honda serviced, stop at the Bank's ATM, drop off clothes at the shelter, pick up a prescription. Normally I would have a passing thought about getting a coffee or lunch, then think about the options and expense and decide to just go home. 

But it was only 10:30 and I hadn't had much for breakfast, so I decided to treat myself at Counter Culture, an artsy, bohemian hangout for locals and one of the more decent food establishments in Santa Fe with a somewhat interesting menu.

I was standing at the counter waiting to place my order for a fried egg, bacon and swiss sandwich and noticed a display of Counter Culture matchbooks that looked like they were for customers to take. I reached for one only to discover that the matches were behind a very clean glass case below the counter. "Oops!" I said out loud.

The woman in back of me who was with a companion, says, "Don't you hate it when that happens?"

"Yeah," I replied and laughed.

The woman gets the attention of the counterperson and says, "Give the guy a book of matches." 

The counterperson complied and handed me a couple of them. I turned to the nice woman and said, "Thanks. I quit smoking 35 years ago and you know, now I never have matches on hand. Sometime you need to light a candle or a birthday cake."

She and her companion laughed and we started chatting about smoking, about the Counter Culture famous humongous cinnamon buns, the coffee, all in a matter of minutes while I ordered my sandwich, coffee, and a "cinnamon bun to go" for hubby. When I told them the bun was for my husband. They said, "How thoughtful," and seemed pleased. In those few minutes we established a rapport and it seemed like we were old friends running into one another at this cafe.

I grabbed my coffee, bun and the order number on its pedestal to place on the table for the waitperson and turned to the two women, "I'm going to eat at the tables outside and I'd love it if you'd care to join me," I said. (Who is this Frank who is suddenly so outgoing?" I thought to myself.)

"Yes, we'd love to," the taller woman replied. I chose a table in the sun and displayed my number for the waitperson who would bring my order. The two women soon joined me with their coffees and their number.

We started chatting immediately and I learned that they are sisters (I knew I'd remember Candy but I've forgotten her sister's name) who have come to town from North Carolina several times since their brother died suddenly, to take care of his house and his affairs. He was a Park Ranger with the Park Service. That was an opening for me to bring up hubby who is also a Park Ranger, but with Bureau of Land Management, Recreation Department. Another instant bond.

We talked about their brother and his many years with the Park Service. And their planning for a memorial service. He traveled a lot, lived alone, liked to target practice shooting his gun on the property where a large picture of the former president was apparently his favorite target. We laughed. I felt the connection more deeply and said, "Just know that I'll be there in spirit at his memorial service."

I told them of Leon's and my adventure in coming to New Mexico. We talked about North Carolina, about quirky Cochiti Lake, about traveling. Candy was the more talkative of the two and she said she wanted to go to Italy, but did not want to go with her husband (I forget why). I immediately said, "I'll go with you!" (Who is this Frank who is suddenly so friendly?" I thought to myself.) We laughed.

Candy asked about my husband, how long we'd been together and when we got married. She shared that her daughter is married to a women and they have two children. She was appreciative of the fact that we older LGBTQs paved the way and made it easier for her daughter to live openly. I reminded her that there were many before my generation who paved the way for us and who had it much harder. 

We talked a bit about the current climate of regressive laws and how things seem to be going backwards. I mentioned that when Leon and I travel cross country we make it a point to carry our marriage license. I said that one of the reasons we chose to relocate to New Mexico was that it is a safer state than many.

The three of us chatted for an hour and seemed not to run out of things to talk about. It seemed like we'd known one another for years. It was such a delightful serendipitous encounter. I told them that meeting them made my day.

We hugged goodbye and made a tentative date to have breakfast together when they return for the memorial service. I asked to take their picture. And here they are. Candy on the left.

The chance meeting really did make my day and the feeling stayed with me all day while I did a few more errands and drove home. I think about the fact that, on other trips to town, I would never have treated myself to breakfast, but for some reason I let go of my frugality and went with it. And I met two beautiful, warm and friendly ladies. These are the little mysteries of life.



3 comments:

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Frank, you social butterfly, you! What a delightful chance meeting and how wonderful that you all had so much in common. I hope you do get to see them again after the memorial!

Moving with Mitchell said...

This is heartwarming. Soul sisters!

Russ Manley said...

Serendipity indeed. I hope you all exchanged phone numbers or whatever it is people exchange nowadays. True friends are good to find.

Like you, I'm not normally the outgoing sort - I learned too well in high school that you can't be too careful - you never know where the next blow will come from - that became a lifelong habit with people I don't already know and trust.

But I have found that serendipity, or grace, occurs when you're not looking for it - and not with a thunderclap or trumpets, but flowing seamlessly out of ordinary events - you make a random choice to stop for breakfast, or walk down this aisle instead of that one, etc.

Years later, you may look back and see that an apparently chance encounter served a greater purpose. Funny how those things happen.

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