Just a reminder to all of you that we in the LGBTQ community have had a long history of fighting for our right to be who we are and to express our sexuality and to love who we want to love.
And a further reminder that our rights are not guaranteed forever, because, if those espousing the draconian vision of the 2025 Agenda get their way, we may lose everything we've gained and then some.
The Second National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights was a
massive political rally in Washington, D.C. on
October 11, 1987. The movement was reaching its zenith in the 80s and AIDS was a major influence in our becoming more visible, and out, and proud.
Lesbian and Gay Rights because the Bi and Trans folks were not yet being specifically acknowledged and the term Queer was still an insult. No one even contemplated a "plus".
Approximately 750,000
people took part in the march and other events including a civil disobedience action in front of the Supreme Court.
The 1987 March on Washington
stands as an important part of LGBTQ history.
I was there with a group from Hartford, CT.
Hector*, Me, Richard, Robin, ?, Joe, ? * Hector was my co-worker at the CT Dept of Health AIDS Program. He died of HIV/AIDS
Remembering the March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Civil Rights: a song by Ten Percent Review:
The focus of the 1987 National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights was to demand our civil rights and to protest the government's lack of concern for HIV/AIDS.
The AIDS Quilt was displayed for the first time on the National Mall in Washington, D.C., during the weekend event.
It covered a space larger than a football field and included 1,920 panels.
I'm not absolutely sure if this picture was taken at the 1987 March in Washington, but I think it was. It was a time before digital cameras and iPhones. Can you imagine?
Some thoughts for PRIDE MONTH though I'm thinking a month may be pushing it.
I was a late bloomer, or should I say a late boomer. I came out in my 30s after a very long and arduous journey filled with fear, denial, guilt, shame, depression and anguish. My coming out was, for me, the very definition of Gay Liberation and I’ve been wearing the Lambda symbol on a necklace for 40 years, since 1984.
Gay Liberation, born in the 70s but conceived years before that, was a political and human rights movement that grew in response to years of oppression and lies and prejudice and misinformation and violence.
During the early hours of June 28, 1969, the Stonewall Inn, thought to be associated with the NY mafia, was raided by police with no warning. Armed with a warrant, police officers roughed up patrons and arrested people for bootlegged alcohol and other violations, including criminal mischief and disorderly conduct.*
Some of our sisters and brothers decided that they just weren’t going to take it anymore and defied the status quo that included regular police harassment and arrests. What followed were not peaceful protests and colorful celebrations. There was street violence born of abuse and pent-up anger and humiliation and frustration. It was the beginning of the modern Gay Rights Movement.
In the years that followed, we marked the anniversary of those angry riots in Greenwich Village with peaceful parades and colorful celebrations. Our liberated voices proclaimed who we are, refuted the lies and misguided opinions and defied the institutions and laws that kept us repressed and powerless. It was a time when all of our new-found pride and optimism and dignity and confidence was wrapped up in a Rainbow Flag speaking volumes to the straight world. It was a time when a cream pie to the face was about as violent as our protests ever got.
The activism of the 70s became more urgent with the growing AIDS epidemic in 80s. It included protests and civil disobedience, widespread media coverage, books and articles, and the voices of enlightened psychologists, medical professionals, religious leaders, politicians and others. Celebrities and public figures came out in solidarity and others were forced out when they became ill with HIV/AIDS.
Lesbians, bisexuals, transgender and other sexual minorities declared their own unique liberation and celebrations throughout the 80s, 90s, 2000’s.
We were finally being heard and the truth of who we are was finally being understood by many who hadn’t really known us, or who had misconceived notions about us. But there were many more who would never, ever, “get it”.
Still, we were optimistic. We were making strides. Some stalwart organizations and even religious and educational institutions were beginning to realize that given the discrimination gay men and women were subjected to by society, government, religion, businesses, other entities and individuals, it was not likely that our sexuality is a choice, but is rather a natural and innate fact of our existence.
Even the Supreme Court had the sense to recognize that we are persons with rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness and that should include the rights and privileges of marriage. Many of us, partnered for years, for whom marriage was never even conceivable, decided to marry after the Supremes gave their blessing.
I think our/my pride was rooted in optimism. My unfettered optimism of those 36 or so years, particularly 1984 through 2014, has begun to erode in recent times. I once believed that truth and facts and reason would be our weapons against lies and ignorance and obstinate beliefs. Because, of course, all people have the capacity to recognize truth and facts and reason, have they not?
The evidence in recent years says no. It seems that the hate and ignorance and over-valued straight sense of superiority has multiplied one hundred fold. It seems that the haters have become more bold and vocal and recalcitrant. And our allies have become complacent and, at best, continue to use tired rhetoric and mild-mannered words in a feeble attempt to incapacitate the enemy.
I remain a proud and out gay man, but I think I am realistic enough to also be afraid. I have conflicting thoughts about Pride celebrations, Pride parades, Pride days, Pride month, rainbows. I fear that we are possibly making ourselves easy targets; that we are creating new Stonewall Inns and Pulse nightclubs but they are venues without walls or disco or booze. I would hesitate to drive across country with a rainbow sticker on my car or depending where, to kiss my husband goodbye at an airport.
Our law makers and law enforcement agencies have shown mediocre, if any, commitment to keeping us safe and of late many lawmakers throughout the country have actually passed laws that could or will endanger us. They threaten to take away our hard earned rights like marriage equality and non-discrimination laws. If the law is no longer on the side of human rights and safety, where is a safe space to be found?
These haters and religious fundamentalists are cowards. Cowards with dangerous weapons. Cowards who target the minority within the minority among us, the phalanx with fewest numbers. The trans community, the non-binary, the gender dysphoric young people. The ignorant, utterly stupid folks who cannot understand same-sex attraction do not have anywhere near the mental capacity to comprehend the realities of those who identify as the opposite sex or who identify as neither or who are born ambiguous or who experience their selves in unique or different ways. Understanding, empathy, curiosity, openness are non-existent among the troglodytes.
And this brings me to my own rather politically incorrect thoughts about our Rainbow Flag.
I remember when the Rainbow Flag made sense. It was just a celebratory and subtly defiant symbol affirming our right to exist fabulously and be ourselves gayfully.
Back in the days of liberation and Pride, the Rainbow Flag was never meant to represent various or individual sexual or gender identities.
In recent years the addition of "Identities" by virtue of additional stripes or symbols or patterns may have the potential for engendering divisiveness, rather than being unifying.
I have no problem with the inclusion of any and all sexual/gender/identities or minorities in the larger LGBTQ+ community. But it seems the anti-gay, anti-everyone-who-is-not cis-gender-heterosexual segment of the human race has decided that our individual differences make us vulnerable. And they are using our differences to chip away at the rights we've gained by attacking the most vulnerable and visibly different.
We best be vigilant. Because they hate all of us and would wipe us off the face of the earth if that were remotely possible.
……And, taking the time time machine back to when I remember the term "GAY" was all inclusive.
“Gay” referred to anyone, male or female or transgender or transvestite (that’s a long forgotten term) or drag queen or butch or fem - anyone with same-sex attraction and to all sexual/gender non-conforming individuals.
There were "gay women" and flamboyant queers and macho guys and the ones who went both ways occasionally. We were all gay. And proud and rebellious and illegal.
With women's lib the gay girls preferred the "lesbian" moniker. OK. I worked for the Gay and Lesbian Health Collective back in that day and age. And then the bi-sexuals want to be singled out with a B and the transfolk didn't feel they were necessarily gay or lesbian or bi, so we added a T. And then they put the L before the G in deference to giving priority to the women. OK, no problem. All the letters a bit awkward and unwieldy, but progress.
Even with the LGBTQ+, not so long ago we were all one family on Pride Day, but not so much these days.
Honestly, are we all but just a letter of the alphabet? The more we splinter our community into specific identities and preferences, the less a part of the whole I feel. I don’t think I am alone in that.
I would suggest that it is in being a part of the greater whole that engenders true Pride.
Oh, well, I am old, so what do I know? The youth will have to journey forward and live on the road they pave.
I lived through a time of repression, liberation, HIV/AIDS and the era our of civil rights, marriage equality, homes in the burbs and RVs. It's been a ride.
Happy Pride.
* In the 1960s, while homosexuality was legal in the state of New York,
establishments openly serving alcohol to gay customers were considered
by the State Liquor Authority (SLA) to be "disorderly houses," or places
where "unlawful practices are habitually carried on by the public."
I have to stop looking up nostalgic things and people from my past on
the internet.
I looked up "Smalltown Boy" on YouTube, only to find that Steve Bronski of Bronski Beat died just a month ago in December of 2021. I must admit that I was initially confusing Steve Bronski with Jimmy Somerville who is more well known as the singer with the falsetto voice on the album Age of Consent. None the less...
"Legendary Bronski Beat musician Steve Bronski died in a fire,
friend confirms. Steve Bronski, co-founder and keyboard player of pop
group Bronski Beat, died after a fire in his flat, according to a
friend. The musician's passing at the age of 61 was announced last week,
but no cause of death was given at the time." Dec 14, 2021, PinkNews, UK.
"Steve
Bronski, part of the 1980s British synth-pop trio Bronski Beat, whose
members were openly gay at a time when that was uncommon and whose early
songs unabashedly addressed homophobia and other gay issues, died after a fireon Dec. 7 at his apartment building in the Soho section of London." NYT Dec 22, 2021.
I have been nostalgic of late and focused on remembering the most joyous times of my life. One of those was Disco.
There was the period just after I came out, late bloomer that I was, in 1984 when I would go to the clubs (a lot). The beat of disco music and I could not help but to dance - man, I loved to dance. The music, the beat, and dancing and the sea of sweaty men would get me high.
I would be thoroughly elated, energized and exhilarated. As they say, "Those were the days."
One of the tunes that had a hypnotic beat and great lyrics was "Smalltown Boy" by Bronski Beat.
It was a gay anthem of sorts, a lament of sorts, the story of a kid who didn't fit in. It wasn't exactly my story, but I could relate.
I have the tune in my iTunes library, on my iPhone, and on my Honda USBdrive along with most of the classic disco tunes of the era. I still love them all. I had been just listening to "Smalltown Boy" while riding my bicycle in the garage*.
Then I was curious to check out "Smalltown Boy" on YouTube. There were several videos and in the comment section I was seeing many people signing off with RIP...it was the first I'd heard about Bronski's passing.
Here is an extended version of "Smalltown Boy" featuring Jimmy Somerville, in memory of Steve Bronski:
*doing my physical therapy routine for my bad left knee using a bike trainer stand; ten to fifteen minutes on a stationary bike is like an eternity in HELL; but music makes the medicine easier to tolerate.
World AIDS Day was December 1, and I've had an opportunity to read posts here and there about those whose lives were lost and the Reagan era's completely ignoring the crisis in the 80s and, well, got to thinking about some other aspects of those years. I was recently directed to a contemporary podcast that was all kinds of positive thinking and healing and praying and I remembered Louise Hay and how so many gay men gravitated to her and her lovely, but toxic, message. Google offered this article that I will share here.
And just to be clear I am more of the mindset that "If You Meet the Buddha, On The Road, Kill Him" (reference to the Book by Sheldon Kopp)
On August 30, 2017, Louise Hay died. Hay was a
metaphysical healer who began her journey in healing at the First Church
of Religious Science in the late 1960s. Her first publication was a
1976 pamphlet that came to be called, “Heal Your Body.” She became a
best-selling author and publisher in the 1980s in the midst of the AIDS
crisis.
I became familiar with Hay’s work in 1988 when I took a second,
part-time job to survive the trickle-down economy of that era. I loved
my second job. I was a clerk in a gay-owned bookstore in the Castro
District of San Francisco called The Love That Dares. I’m not sure I
knew of Louise Hay before that moment, but it became apparent that the
store sold Hay’s material more than anything else. The customers buying
her books and cassette tapes were gay men hoping to survive the AIDS
epidemic, looking for answers or seeking hope.
Even then, Hay had her detractors. Her solutions were not scientific
and blamed disease not on viruses or cells gone amok, but on behavior
and negativity. In You Can Heal Your Life she wrote, “I believe we create every so-called illness in our body.”1
This is, of course, problematic, and carries with it the insinuation
that you are sick because you are not trying hard enough to make
yourself well.2
In 1988, Los Angeles Times journalist Beth Ann Krier interviewed Dr. Michael Gottlieb for a piece about Hay.
Gottlieb was one of the physicians who had originally identified AIDS
in 1981. He stated, “As a physician, I think that love and acceptance
and forgiveness may well be an important component of healing, but AIDS
is a viral disease caused by a virus and not by lack of love.” For Hay,
lack of self-love was at the center of illness and the center of
healing. According to “The List” of dis-eases (as she called them) first
published in Heal Your Body in 1982, and then updated for
inclusion in her other works, the probable causes of AIDS included
“[f]eeling defenseless and hopeless,” and “[s]exual guilt.”3
I have a great deal of skepticism about anything that smacks of
cult-like thinking and a great deal of anger about “cures” that blame
the victims. Of course, blaming victims wasn’t new in the 1980s; it has a
long history. In 1747, John Wesley first published a self-help medical
guide that began by blaming disease on sin. At first, man “knew no sin,
so he knew no pain, no sickness, weakness, or bodily disorder.” But
following the original sin, “The seeds of weakness and pain, of sickness
and death, are now lodged in our inmost substance.”4
For Wesley, it was not unconditional love that was the cure, however,
but a course of medicine, rest, and “that Old unfashionable Medicine,
Prayer.”5
In a self-help book first published in 1803 and entitled, Advice
to Mothers, on The Subject of Their Own Health; and of the Means of
Promoting the Health, Strength, and Beauty of their Offspring,
William Buchan placed the blame of miscarriage squarely on women’s
behavior. He advised pregnant women to “be doubly attentive to preserve
the utmost sweetness and serenity of temper … and to keep every other
unruly passion or desire under the steady control of mildness and
reason.” Pregnant women should not be ruled by fear, he cautioned. While
they might be alarmed by stories about the dangers of pregnancy, cases
of “miscarriage or of death” were rare and “owing to the improper
conduct of women themselves.”6
14th annual Lesbian and Gay Pride parade in New York, June 27, 1983. (Mario Suriani/Associated Press)
While statements like these make my blood boil, as a resident of the
Castro in the late 1980s, I also realize that people like Hay gave dying
men a rope to cling to. It is important to remember that in that era,
there was little else. The pharmaceutical giant, Burroughs-Wellcome,
patented AZT in 1985 and it was approved as a treatment for AIDS by the
Food and Drug Administration in 1987. However, for many men, AZT proved
toxic, particularly in the doses in which it was administered, and, by
itself, AZT is not enough to prevent HIV or death from AIDS.
Additionally, government on all levels was largely ignoring the AIDS
epidemic because of the stigma of a disease predominantly presenting
itself among gay men and intravenous drug users.
In 1983, Pat Buchanan, then communications director for Ronald Reagan, had called AIDS
“nature’s revenge on gay men.” Only six years into the AIDS crisis, in
June 1987, had President Ronald Reagan’s administration finally
established a presidential commission on HIV/AIDS, while still largely
shying away from public discussions of the disease. In 1988, on the
floor of the Senate, Jesse Helms defended an appropriations bill
amendment that kept funding from AIDS education by stating, “You have got to call a spade a spade, and a perverted human being a perverted human being.”
Add to this neglect and hatred by government, the neglect and hatred
of society. Discrimination against gay men was the societal norm and
many families disowned their sons when they came out as gay or bisexual
and HIV+. Those who survived that era recount that neglect. In a 2003 interview with Mark Harrington,
one of the leading members of the New York AIDS Coalition to Unleash
Power’s Treatment and Data subcommittee, Sarah Schulman asked, “[W]ere
people surprised that people could suffer and die and their families
never show up?” Harrington replied, “I was. But, I also — remember, the
context of ACT UP was also this incredible homophobia of the Reagan
years, and this incredible, sort of, hatred and disgust of gay people.
So, given that all those things were going on in the broader society,
those parents were part of that hatred of gay people.”
In the midst of this neglect and hatred, many of the men I knew who
were infected with HIV looked in many directions for a solution. My
friend Phil, one of the members of the affinity group to which I
belonged, and with whom I protested in front of the U.S. Supreme Court
on October 13, 1987, was a member of a macrobiotic society. Phil swore
that the combination of coming out to his family and a macrobiotic diet
was making him better. In one of our affinity group’s first meetings, he
told us that the thrush from which he had suffered had disappeared, and
that he felt healthier than he had in years.
While Hay blamed the ill for their illnesses, she also preached love.
“Louise Hay, an advocate for unconditional love and forgiveness during
the height of the AIDS crisis, died peacefully Wednesday morning of
natural causes,” is the first line of Hay’s obituary in the LGBT Los Angeles Blade. In a blog called, “My Fabulous Disease,”
Mark S. King wrote that Hay’s “message of self-love and unconditional
acceptance—of our lives and other people—resonated like a beacon to the
frightened gay men of Los Angeles.”
It was in Los Angeles in 1987 that the Hay Rides started, gatherings
of people with AIDS, mostly gay men, looking for an answer or, at the
very least, loving human contact. Some came away from the Hay Rides in
despair, but others came away with self-love that was hard to find as a
gay man in the 1980s. As Hay wrote, “Often what we think of as the things ‘wrong’ with us are only our experiences of our own individuality.”7 This message, alone, was a powerful one.
The End, but Not the End I Meant to Write
Over the last two months, I have thought a lot about Louise Hay and
her legacy. When I conceived of this piece, I thought my conclusion
would be a mixed one: that blaming the ill was harmful, but that,
perhaps, for some of the sick and dying the good of being loved and
touched in an era marked by hatred and loathing outweighed that harm. I
was almost finished writing and thought I would ruminate over the
conclusion while I walked the dogs, coming back mid-morning to write
that there was bad and good.
Before heading out the door with my furry companions, I checked
Facebook. In response to a righteous rant from a young friend of mine,
there was this reply, “I believe the words ‘sexual assault’ and ‘sexual
harassment’ are thrown out way too loosely. Victim mentality is the
problem and that’s the real issue. You can only be a victim if you allow
yourself to be one. Regardless of who you are. Man, woman, gay,
straight, etc.”
Reading those words, so stark on my screen, I thought: No. Louise Hay
did more harm than good. Building an industry on the message that
“DIS-EASE CAN BE HEALED, IF WE ARE WILLING TO CHANGE THE WAY WE THINK
AND BELIEVE AND ACT!” perpetuates the cultural belief that harm is chosen, consciously or unconsciously.8
People have AIDS because of denial of self. Brain tumors are caused by
refusing to change old patterns. Women are raped because they act like
victims. For decades we have tried to rid ourselves of those ideas with
little, or no, success.
Less than a month after Hay’s death David Groff published a piece for Slate entitled, “How Louise Hay’s Spiritual Pseudoscience Harmed a Generation of Gay Men.”
Although Groff acknowledged that Hay “offered open if judgmental arms,”
he concluded that, “The last thing people with AIDS needed to hear was
that they had caused their own illness.”
My friends who lived and died before the era of effective treatment
reached for visualization, meditation, diet, vitamins, and snake oil. In
some cases, they survived the early years of the plague, and in others,
they did not. There were no magical outcomes. Those who caught the
virus are not to be blamed for their illness. Those who did not survive
are not to be blamed for their deaths. There is still stigma, but
activists and medical health professionals have worked to rid our
society of that. Perhaps some of the dying needed Hay’s love in the
1980s. If only she could have offered it without blame.
Notes
Louise L. Hay, You Can Heal Your Life Gift Edition (Hay House, 1999), 151. Return to text.
William Buchan, Advice to Mothers, on the Subject
of their Own Health; and on the Means of Promoting the Health,
Strength, and Beauty, of their Offspring (London: T. Caddell and W. Davies, 1811), 31-32. Return to text.
Hay, You Can Heal Your Life, 101. Emphasis in the original. Return to text.
Ibid., 239. The shouting caps are in the original. Return to text.
As I described in my memoir, I went through therapists like Kleenex. Fortunately I didn't have electroshock or other draconian "treatments" to cure me. But now, at 72, I consider myself, if not fully cured, nicely aged.
Went to Pride Festival in Santa Fe with Denise and the dogs, Benni and Gilbert (our house guest while his dads are away).
New York it ain't...but....It is amazing that this festival takes place (or can take place) here and around the globe 50 years after the Stonewall riots.
Stonewall...the protest that came as a result of so many years, so many centuries, of oppression. It is an oppression that we all carry within our collective and individual memory and in our consciousness and in our viscera.
Liberation from that oppression is sweet. But we are definitely not there yet.
It is amazing that I can be there with my rainbow hat and a young woman comes up to me and says "I love your fedora!" and high fives me. We've come a long way baby.
I wonder if the youngsters know that the music they're dancing to is by Bronski Beat and released 35 years ago in 1984!
(Sorry for the delayed flip - it will go horizontal momentarily)
I remember going to Gay Pride in NYC in the late 80s or early 90s with a group of the kids from Your Turf - the youth support group I and Leon and Joyce and Robin facilitated. One of the "graduates" of the group had a job driving school busses and was able to rent a bus for the day. About 15 kids and 10 adults went to Pride on that bus. We never even thought about getting "parental permission" or whether we needed special insurance, or if it was illegal to transport kids across state lines. Most were in their late teens or early twenties, so I guess we were OK.
Me and Leon
I was moved when the "Gender Non-conforming" contingent marched by.
I was thinking how wonderful that these individuals can express their "I Am What I Am-ness" and how they deserve the basic human right to be who they are and who they choose to be without some right-wingnut, fundamentalist christian judgmental bigot telling them otherwise and trying to deny them that right...so...
Matthew Shepard's ashes were interred this week at the National Episcopal Cathedral.
A bright spot because the interment is not only fitting and respectful, but it also serves as a strong message to all fundamentalist christians that they do not speak for all people of faith. Especially in view of the fact that Matthew's parents legitimately feared that any grave or memorial site would very likely be vandalized.
That is a sad commentary on the state of our world.
Over the past twenty years we LGBT folks have seen so much progress: we've won Supreme Court victories, we've gotten marriage equality, we've had LGBT celebrities come out, we see sympathetic, multi-dimensional and mainstream LGBT characters on TV and in movies. We've gotten the sense that we've arrived, that we are not only tolerated, but accepted and even admired; that the world we live in has become safer and more enlightened and that our country's values have evolved.
UNTIL the new wave of hatred, intolerance and bigotry arrived on the heels of this current president's campaign, beginning in June of 2015.
The floodgates were opened further on election day 2016, when many of his supporters felt that their hateful opinions were given legitimacy and they became hell-bent on un-doing and destroying everything that Mathew Shepard and the LGBT community had fought for and achieved.
It is just inconceivable how we have arrived at this place.
It is wrong and discouraging that we should have to see our fortress being dismantled piece by piece, or that we should have to fight the good fight all over again.
And all those allies and friends sometimes really don't seem to fully get it. There is danger afoot in this administration and among it's rabid supporters. Stay vigilant.
We will not be shaken, we will be strong. Stay strong my friends, stay strong.
So many young people probably never heard of Dr. Matilda Krim, but her name was a gay household word back in the 80's, especially among those of us who were intimately involved in the AIDS arena and/or public health. She championed science over judgement, compassion over discrimination and activism over status quo.
Let us not forget those who lost their lives in a senseless act of hate and violence. And also keep in mind the families, loved ones, friends and the entire Orlando community whose loss and grief is still very real and present.
A beautiful, joyous symbol that has been adopted all over the world to proclaim our pride. Especially dear to those of us who grew up in a time when we struggled privately with our emerging but inevitable identity. May it continue to wave with dignity against so much hatred, prejudice, violence and lack of understanding.
It is time to repair the damage (if that is even possible) caused by ex-gay therapies and religious "ministries" that have caused harm to LGBT individuals over the past decades.
This letter is worth a read and should be widely distributed. From GayStarNews Reprinted here without permission:
9 former ‘ex-gay therapy’ leaders apologize and call for its banning
Some of the leading figures in the global ‘ex-gay’ movement have signed a joint letter of apology and have now pledged to denounce attempts to ‘cure’ people of their same-sex attractions
Leading former figures from ‘ex-gay’ groups including Exodus International and Love In Action have today released a letter of apology and a pledge to work to undo the harm they have done.
The group includes Exodus International co-founder Michael Bussee, Courage UK founder Jeremy Marks, Coming Back founder Bill Prickett, Love In Action outreach director Tim Rymel and executive director John J Smid, Paraklete Ministries founder Darlene Bogle and Yvette Schnieder who earlier this week announced her support for the banning of so-called reparative therapies on minors.
Some of the former ex-gay leaders who signed the letter have apologized previously or have acknowledged that reparative therapies do not work but this is the first time this many former ex-gay leaders have joined together to call for their banning.
Read the letter and the full list of signatories below
“Conversion Therapy, also known as “reparative therapy”, “ex-gay therapy,” or “sexual orientation change efforts” (SOCE), professes to help lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people to change or overcome their sexual orientation or gender identity. The majority of those who practice this “therapy” often do so with little or no formal psychological training, operating instead from a strict religious perspective, believing homosexuality to be a “sin.”
At one time, we were not only deeply involved in these “ex-gay” programs, we were the founders, the leaders, and the promoters. Together we represent more than half a century of experience, so few people are more knowledgeable about the ineffectiveness and harm of conversion therapy. We know first-hand the terrible emotional and spiritual damage it can cause, especially for LGBT youth. We once believed that there was something morally wrong and psychologically “broken” about being LGBT. We know better now.
We once believed that sexual orientation or gender identity were somehow chosen or could be changed. We know better now. We once thought it was impossible to embrace our sexual orientation or sexual identity as an intrinsic, healthy part of who we are and who we were created to be. We know better now. Looking back, we were just believing (and sometimes teaching) what we had been taught—that our identity needed mending. We grew up being told that being LGBT was disordered, sick, mentally ill, sinful, and displeasing to God. We grew up being told that loving, same-sex relationships were shallow, lust-driven, deceived, disordered, and impossible.
We grew up with the repetitive message that LGBT people were not enough — not straight enough, not Christian enough, not manly or womanly enough, not faithful enough, not praying enough. Never, ever enough. “Toxic” probably sums it up best. That message is poison to the soul. Especially a child’s soul. It can take a lifetime to get rid of that old programming and replace it with healthy, non-toxic views of yourself. Recovery from conversion therapy is difficult at best. Some remain forever scarred, emotionally and spiritually.
Conversion therapy reinforces internalized homophobia, anxiety, guilt and depression. It leads to self-loathing and emotional and psychological harm when change doesn’t happen. Regrettably, too many will choose suicide as a result of their sense of failure. In light of this, we now stand united in our conviction that conversion therapy is not “therapy,” but is instead both ineffective and harmful.
We align ourselves with every major mainstream professional medical and mental health organization in denouncing attempts to change sexual orientation or gender identity. We admonish parents to love and accept your LGBT children as they are. We beseech the church to accept, embrace, and affirm LGBT persons with full equality and inclusion.
As former “ex-gay” leaders, having witnessed the incredible harm done to those who attempted to change their sexual orientation or gender identity, we join together in calling for a ban on conversion therapy. It is our firm belief that it is much more productive to support, counsel, and mentor LGBT individuals to embrace who they are in order to live happy, well-adjusted lives. We fully support the aim of #BornPerfect to bring an end to conversion therapy.”
Signed:
Brad Allen Lay Leader Volunteer (2005-2007) Church Network Coordinator (2007) Exodus International Headquarters
Darlene Bogle Founder, Director, Counselor (1985 to 1992) Paraklete Ministries
Michael Bussee EXIT (1974-1979) Co-founder (1976-1979) Exodus International
Thanks to Wicked Gay Blog for this video.
I have not had time to view the entire video, but I am posting it now rather than later.
I'll maybe add a few words after I've had a chance to view the entire video. I'll just say that I think it is important for us all to know our LGBT history - and not to forget or dismiss the struggles of the past in light of the victories of the moment.
Too bad the video ended abruptly - hope there is a part 2.
