Nostalgia Without a Real Theme

 Drove into town and back listening to some old songs on my thumb drive in the car. A whole bunch of memories and emotions.

Here is a sample of my playlist for today: (The video will auto-play the next song in the queue)

 

San Francisco - Scott McKenzie

California Dreamin' - Mamas and Papas

What A Fool Believes - The Doobie Brothers

Sounds Of Silence - Simon and Garfunkel

I've Never Seen Love Like This - Orpheus

Lay Down Candles In The Rain - Melanie

Look What They've Done To My Song Ma - Melanie

Poetry Man - Phoebe Snow

Under The Boardwalk - Rickie Lee Jones

Can't Find The Time To Tell You - Orpheus

Imagine - John Lennon

So In Love - k.d. lang

 

A Song by gay artist Jeff Krassner that I could not find on YouTube or anywhere on the internet so I will attempt to upload my own video (my first attempt exceeded the size limit)

“I Hear the Angels Sing”   Jeff Krassner

I can’t believe they don’t understand
‘bout the love I feel for you
When you touch me baby
I feel the angels sing

They tell me it’s wrong
That the devil is loose
They think he’s draggin’ us under
But they don’t have a clue

‘cause when you touch me baby
I hear the angels sing
And when you give yourself to me
Honestly, I hear the angels sing

What makes them think I would turn you away
In this world filled with madness and sorrow
I won’t sell my soul
Or hide any longer
I won’t love you in darkness
Just to make them feel stronger

‘cause when you touch me baby
I hear the angels sing
And when you give yourself to me
Honestly, I hear the angels sing

And you remind me that life can be sweet
Though the world says we don’t belong
So let them preach some old ancient rules
But I know in my heart
It’s the judgment of fools

‘cause when you touch me baby
I hear the angels sing
And when you give yourself to me
Honestly, I hear the angels sing
Over and over I hear the angels
Over and over I hear the angels
Over and over I hear the angels sing

A few photos while you're listening: 

 

 

 

Lay Down (Candles in the Rain)

Song by Edwin Hawkin Singers and Melanie

 

Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown
Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown

We were so close, there was no room
We bled inside each other's wounds
We all had caught the same disease
And we all sang the songs of peace

Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown
Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown

So raise the candles high
'Cause if you don't, we could stay black against the night
Oh, raise them higher again
And if you do, we could stay dry against the rain

Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown
Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown

We were so close, there was no room
We bled inside each other's wounds
We all had caught the same disease
And we all sang the songs of peace
Some came to sing, some came to pray
Some came to keep the dark away

So raise (raise) the candles high (up high)
'Cause if you don't we could stay black against the sky
Oh, oh, raise (raise) them higher again (up high)
And if you do, we could stay dry against the rain

Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown
(You gotta) lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown

lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown
(Oh, you gotta) lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown

 

Look What They Did to My Song, Ma

Song by Melanie

 

Look what they've done to my song, ma

Look at what they've done to my song, ma

It was the only thing I could do half right
And it's turning out all wrong, ma, look
What they've done to my song

 

Look what they've done to my song, ma
Look what they've done to my song, ma
It was the only thing I could do half right
Turning out all wrong, ma
Look what they've done to my song

 

Look what they've done to my brain, ma
Look at what they've done to my brain
Well, they picked it like a chicken bone
And I think that I'm half insane, ma
Look what they've done to my song

 

Oh, I wish that I could find a good book to live in
Oh, I wish that I could find a good book
Well, if I could find a real good book
I'd never have to come out and look at
What they've done to my song

 

Ils ont changé ma chanson, ma
Ils ont changé ma chanson, ma
C'est la seule chose que je peux faire
Et ce n'est pas bon, ma
Ils ont changé ma chanson

 

But maybe, it'll all be all right, ma
Maybe, it'll all be okay
Well, if the people are buying tears
Then I'm gonna be rich girl some day, ma
Look what they've done to my song

Look what they've done to my song, ma-ma-ma
 

Look, look what they've done to my song
You know, they tied it up in a plastic bag
And then turned it upside down, oh ma-ma
Look at what they've done
Want to look at what they've done, oh ma-ma
Look what they've done to my song

 

I’m Tired

 I am going to try real hard to take a break from the news. I know it’s going to be difficult as I am a JMG addict. And forgive me if I’m not always checking in and or commenting on your blogs.

I’m certain there will be a resistance movement of some kind. I will assess at some point what part I can play in such a movement. One of my neighbors suggested we take down our rainbow flag, which flies prominently at our front entrance. I said no NEVER. 

I may be taking a break, but I am not retreating or God forbid going back in the closet.

Be well  RESIST. 

One of Many Analyses

From the Hawkeye Beacon: This post-election analysis is from Professor Christopher Robichaud, Senior Lecturer in Ethics and Public Policy, Harvard: “I'll say this, and then I likely won't be saying much more on here for quite some time, to the relief of some, I'm sure. But my farewell warning is this. Everyone in the days and weeks ahead will use this loss as an opportunity to seek validation for their own hobby horse complaint. Harris lost because she campaigned with Liz Cheney. Harris lost because she didn't embrace Gaza. Harris lost because she didn't choose Shapiro. Harris lost because she wasn't progressive enough (possibly my favorite one). Take a good hard look at the map, my friends. Trump has won the popular vote. Trump ran the table. Explaining that with your hobby horse issue isn't going to cut it, tempting and consoling as it may be. The problem isn't the electoral college. The problem isn't that we didn't have a full primary. The problem isn't Harris. The problem isn't that Dems didn't have the right message. The problem isn't even inflation or the border. The problem is so much worse than any of those things. Those are all technical problems, with straightforward expertise fixes. If only it were so! No, our problem is not technical. It's very much adaptive. A party that embraced the Big Lie, supported an insurrection, and has been selling conspiracy-addled madness for years was widely and enthusiastically embraced. Voter turnout was profound! People didn't sit this out. Simply put, the problem--as some of you have rightly posted--is cultural. America, culturally, has completely abandoned a politics of decency and respect and has embraced instead a politics of resentment, revenge, false nostalgia, and bullying. And if you look at the demographics, you also won't be able to comfort yourself that it's just a white thing, or a working class thing, or an education thing. It's multi-class, multi-gender, multi-educational and multi-racial. That's what winning the popular vote means. That's what running the table amounts to. A culture that has descended to this level of debasement is not easily fixed. In fact it may not ever be fixed. The timeline for changing something like this is decades--at best--not two-to-four year election cycles. You can extend that in this case, because with the GOP likely controlling all branches of federal government and the courts, they will ensure that mechanisms are in place to keep them in power long after their popularity has waned. You can count on that. The GOP evolved into a party of rage, lies, and revenge--and it correctly diagnosed that there was and is a large appetite for that. That's what the country wants. At least, enough of the country wants it to ensure broad appeal and widespread electoral success. The old GOP will never return, and the Dems have nothing to say to American culture at the moment. Nothing. They've been speaking to a country that's gone, like dust in the wind. And that's my final thought, which my posts last night alluded to. The America I knew and loved is gone. This new America--nah, I won't even bother. I will say that cultural change is less likely to occur in politics, or in the academy. You're not going to get people to see how vulgar they've become through a clever argument or a nice campaign speech, that's for sure. This would be time for the arts, broadly understood, to step in. The arts can change hearts and minds. Too bad the arts have been systematically dismantled in education in this country, and on the other end, the tech industry's assault on the arts through AI is sure to hollow out any good-faith efforts that might emerge. And for the rest of the world, America's rightward lurch is, I'm afraid, bad news for you too. I know you know this. Because it's not isolated, is it? It's just at the moment the most prominent example of a burgeoning trend. And this will embolden others in other countries, to be sure. We need not speculate what happens when countries become mired in lies, embrace resentment, and savor bullying. We know exactly what happens. Bloody conflict and global destabilization. The first quarter of the 21st century will therefore in hindsight be viewed as the seed-planting stage for the absolute shit show that's about to unfold globally over the next two and a half decades. Count on it. Adopt whatever coping and endurance strategies you have available. You're going to need it. I think that's all I've left to say.”

Still Grieving

I feel like my guts have been torn out. 

I remember the four years of horror and the next four will likely be worst for so many of us: women, immigrants, gays, lesbians, transexuals, democrats, sick, elderly, children, the poor,...

His list is long and the authors of Project 2025 are salivating. Ready to destroy everything we have fought for.

As a gay man I am terrified of what could happen to us. I am still in denial, still hoping for some miracle; a "deus ex machina" like in Greek tragedies.

Leon and I fantasize about Biden resigning and letting Harris become President #47, if only for a short time. Perhaps she will have a plan and she will have "IMMUNITY" to carry it out. To save the country. I want desperately for all of us to RESIST but I don't know how to go about doing that.

Back in the day we marched and protested. I'm not sure I have the energy to do that. Or whether marching and protesting will really make any difference now. Amen.

A Diversion

 I guess we needed this diversion to keep our minds off of other things. Leon and I just got finished shoveling our driveway and clearing off the cars so that he could get to work. And now our power is out in our town.

Yes I Know

 Me Too

One Last Thing

 Click to enlarge

Lots of Rocks and Vanished Memories

 Whenever we have guests from out of state we like to take them to see Leon's "Office" in the New Mexico wilderness. We spent the day on Saturday wandering around BLM land in the high desert. Lots of Rocks. Some scenes may look familiar as I've posted similar photos before.

 

Cactus growing in the rock crevices

This is the area Leon calls "Mars" but perhaps "Moon" would also describe the terrain.

 

Leon overseeing his territory.

Later that evening we dragged out some old VCR video tapes that we hadn't looked at since they were filmed in 1993. 

We were on a trip to California to visit a friend Tommy and as the movie unfolded with views of the California coast Leon and I were both puzzled by our complete lack of recognition of what we were seeing. 

Neither of us recognized the location, the buildings, the scenery, or the entire experience itself.

I swore that I was not actually there, that Leon must have gone alone...but he didn't recall any of the scenes depicted in the video either... until I heard my voice on the tape and soon enough, my own image!

How is it possible that such a trip that we took together in 1993 has been erased from our memory? 

We did recall some of the events that occurred later in the video, but without the details that we were seeing. 

We did remember that we rented a car in California and drove to Arizona and the Grand Canyon. I will not forget my experience of seeing the Grand Canyon early in the morning just after sunrise before any crowds had arrived.

But so much of the rest of the trip...Vanishing memories...scary. 

Stills from the video on our TV:

Me

Leon

Leon

Me

Me

10th Anniversary and Growing Old Un-Gracefully

  Today is Leon's and my Tenth Wedding Anniversary though it's been 36 years we've been together. 

I am eternally grateful for having met and wed such a kind, loving and devoted man with whom I've spent almost half my life.  I am a moody, crabby, anxious, introverted old guy with new aches and pains, hearing aids, knee and joint issues and a back ache. And hubby still puts up with me.

I just had cataract surgery on my right eye (the left eye was done three weeks ago) and I was not prepared for the the fact that I can see better for distance, but cannot see close without reading glasses. 

I got a pair of readers at the pharmacy but they are not quite right...And that right now is a royal pain in the ass because what I need until I get a new prescription (which I cannot do for at least 4-6 weeks) is a pair of bifocal reading glasses which are nowhere to be found in these parts but have to be ordered on line....

This has made me irritable and cranky. I am living up to my moniker "Cranky Franky" for sure...and not disposed to celebrate our Anniversary in style.

But it's early in the day so I'll get over it before Leon gets home from work. 

I think we will have dinner at home this evening and maybe go out to a restaurant this weekend to celebrate a bit more formally. 

 

The early years:

Good Morning

Leon and I voted yesterday morning. Here's a couple of photos I took when we got out of the polling place. I'd like to think it was a good omen but I don't believe in omens.

 The view from higher ground.

October 11, 1987 - Thirty-seven Years Ago - The Second National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights

Just a reminder to all of you that we in the LGBTQ community have had a long history of fighting for our right to be who we are and to express our sexuality and to love who we want to love.  

And a further reminder that our rights are not guaranteed forever, because, if those espousing the draconian vision of the 2025 Agenda get their way, we may lose everything we've gained and then some.

The Second National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights was a massive political rally in Washington, D.C. on October 11, 1987. The movement was reaching its zenith in the 80s and  AIDS was a major influence in our becoming more visible, and out, and proud. 

Lesbian and Gay Rights because the Bi and Trans folks were not yet being specifically acknowledged and the term Queer was still an insult. No one even contemplated a "plus".

Approximately 750,000 people took part in the march and other events including a civil disobedience action in front of the Supreme Court.

The 1987 March on Washington stands as an important part of LGBTQ history. 

 I was there with a group from Hartford, CT.

Hector*,  Me, Richard, Robin, ?, Joe, ?
   * Hector was my co-worker at the CT Dept of Health AIDS Program. He died of HIV/AIDS

Remembering the March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Civil Rights: a song by Ten Percent Review:

 

The focus of the 1987 National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights was to demand our civil rights and to protest the government's lack of concern for HIV/AIDS.

The AIDS Quilt was displayed for the first time on the National Mall in Washington, D.C., during the weekend event.

It covered a space larger than a football field and included 1,920 panels.

I'm not absolutely sure if this picture was taken at the 1987 March in Washington, but I think it was. It was a time before digital cameras and iPhones. Can you imagine?