Post to Myself

 I am sitting in my recliner, back aching because I'm too stubborn to know when to quit gardening and take care of myself. It's been three days of alternating indomethecin, naproxin, ibuprofen, acetaminophen, methocarbamol and topical creams. Not helping much.

Hubs is off with visitors from Vermont, showing them the well kept secret petrified forest in his Bureau of Land Management "office".  It is not a "tourist attraction" - just part of the BLM wilderness that he patrols. I've posted about it before. 

I'm pretending that the corn chips next to me, to which I added extra salt, are potato chips for which I've had a craving for weeks. (Have you seen the price of potato chips? 8.5 ounces for $5.99. I can buy a 10 pound bag of potatoes for $3.99.) I'm not crazy about corn chips. For some reason they stick in my throat kind of like popcorn does. It must be a thing with corn snacks.

I am listening to Romantica Radio from Salerno, Italy on the Radio Garden App on my iPhone playing through a Bluetooth speaker. Radio Garden lets you listen to radio stations from around the world - for free. Adds will pop up on the screen, but they don't interrupt the music.  

Romantica Radio plays nice music, mostly in Italian, but they play English language songs and artists quite often. My other favorite station is Bossa Nova Brazil from Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Bossa Nova can be a bit repetitive, but I don't mind. I find it relaxing.

Despite the back issue I made eggplant parmigiano for dinner. It meant being on my feet while preparing it, so the back is complaining about that too. It will go with the pork chops and broccoli and cauliflower and homemade bread. Can't have the Vermonters going to bed hungry.

Do I obsess about food? It does occupy much of my waking hours and of course my sleeping hours are fewer and fewer. Planning, grocery shopping, prepping, cooking, using leftovers creatively. Not to mention the mess and clean up. And thus the garden also comes into play: having fresh vegetables when those Mexican vegetable prices skyrocket.

The problem is growing vegetables in New Mexico has to be more of a challenge than farming in Mexico. We are in high desert. The atmosphere is thin at this altitude which allows the sun to make our veggies very unhappy and sometimes reluctant to bear fruit. 

"Prendi questa mano Zingara" is playing on Romantica. "Gypsy, take this hand" is an old song from the '69 San Remo Music Festival.

Take this hand, Gypsy.
Tell me also what fate I will have.
Speak about my love—I am not afraid
because I know that by now
it does not belong to me.

....more....

 
Take this hand, Gypsy.
Also read what my destiny will be.
Tell me who loves me.
Give me hope—
this is all that matters to me now.

 

It's a pretty song. I remember the song. I was in Italy in 1969. At Loyola University Rome Center for my Junior year in college. It was literally almost three quarters of a lifetime ago. I may still not know my destiny or my fate but at least I do know who loves me.

 

 

The song reminds me of studying Italian: one of the quirks of the language: the word for hand is "mano" - ordinarily words ending in "o" are "masculine" but "mano" is "feminine" and takes the feminine adjective "questa". 

It also reminds me of a story my grandma told of the time her younger sister went to see the Zingara - the fortune teller. Grandma scolded her sister and then she went to the fortune teller herself: to get her sister's money back. Which she did. You didn't mess with grandma.

While watching "Dream of Italy" on PBS there was an old guy who philosophized about how, when you are old,  there is less of the future to anticipate, to look forward to, to wonder about; but there is a lot more of the past to recall, to think about, to wonder about. Take this hand, Gypsy. Also read what my destiny will be. Tell me who loves me. Give me hope—this is all that matters to me now.

The recliner is helping my back some. The corn chips and the music are just adjunct pleasures. I do wish I had potato chips.

No Crystal Ball...but...

 

I am always skeptical of predictions about the future but as for the current state of affairs: Musk is a dangerous man whose main ambition is to utterly destroy the United States government as we know it. Musk is feeling invulnerable, and whether he is or not will not matter because while we wait to find out, he is freely dismantling every department, agency and safeguard that has been put in place to serve and protect the citizens of this country. He may be a black hole of wealth but he is more driven by the jollies he gets from knocking over the first domino and then watching to see what happens.

I want to be optimistic but I find that difficult today because I see no real effort to stop the bulldozing of America. Commentary, speeches, outrage, anger and burning Teslas all seem impotent against the momentum and wake of the tsunami of evil.

So as for a tentative prediction about the future: the current destruction of democracy, government and societal safeguards and the domino effect of that destruction will likely be long lasting - years, decades, generations? For those of us who may survive, we will have to learn how to exist indefinitely in a dystopian society. Restoring even the semblance of a humanitarian government will take efforts I cannot even imagine.

Today Was Bread Day

 

Three Loaves

12 Rolls

Am I an Atheist?

 I recently posted the video of Garth Brooks and Trisha Yearwood singing John Lennon's Imagine at Jimmy Carter's funeral. In one of the comments the song was referred to as the "atheist anthem" (I'd never heard that before) and it got me thinking. Am I really an atheist?

First of all I find the song Imagine to be deeply meaningful and even spiritual. And yes, I am "a-religious", if not entirely "anti-religious" although I can find plenty of reasons to be anti-religion. I probably have a deeper understanding and appreciation of religion, particularly Catholicism, than most who profess to be anti-religion and that, I think, gives my opinion some authority.

As for the "theos" or the "theoí" - there is little I can add to the millennia of preponderance on the topic. I've said before that I don't necessarily not believe in the same god that many who call themselves atheist don't believe in or for the same reasons. My disbelief or non-belief is more sophisticated than not believing in the god that a six-year old believes is watching them while they steal a piece of candy at the 7-11.

But with that said, what I will offer is a re-post of something that appeared on this blog back in December, 2011. It was my Christmas entry (I did not do one this 2024 holiday season as I have less and less to say on this platform and fewer to say it to.) Anyhow, for what it's worth:

Saturday, December 24, 2011

I Can Say Nothing Of God Except...

Last year my sister, who is a Sister of Mercy, sent me a prayer she had written about the things and people in her life that gave meaning to the celebration of Christmas.

Each line began with the words, "I can say nothing of God except..."

This prayer reminds us, whether theist, atheist or agnostic, that we can really say little meaningful about God.  That perhaps our belief in God's existence is about as meaningful as another's belief in God's Non-existence. The fact that so many people today claim to know "God", the "will of God" or who or what or which country has "God's favor", is, if nothing else, awfully self-righteous and arrogant.

Perhaps we can say nothing of god except ... what is available to us in our own unique, concrete, quotidian experience. This year I offer my version of my sister's prayer:

I Can Say Nothing of God Except... (c 2019, edited 2025)

I can say nothing of God except the serenity of a walk in the woods on a clear December morning

I can say nothing of God except the surprise that the Bird of Paradise gave me when, after fifteen years, it bloomed in the sun room one February

I can say nothing of God except skiing down a mountain on a sunny winter day

I can say nothing of God except the good food we have to eat and share with whoever enters our home

I can say nothing of God except the seniors who think it is a miracle to make digital photos appear on the computer screen

I can say nothing of God except the shared company of long-time friends

I can say nothing of God except airplanes have taken me to fascinating places

I can say nothing of God except the memory of my mom and grandma and aunts makes me happy when I make manicotti or escarole with beans or cookies

I can say nothing of God except the paintings on the wall that my dad made when he was seventeen

I can say nothing of God except walking up to the rim of the Grand Canyon very early one morning and being speechless for fifteen minutes while my tears flowed spontaneously

I can say nothing of God except sleeping on the beach while listening to Sergio Mendes

I can say nothing of God except an old Valentine from my honey I came across while cleaning drawers

I can say nothing of God except the vastness of the sea and a sailboat against blue sky

I can say nothing of God except the touch of, and touching another man 

I can say nothing of God except I am sitting in the living room with the man I love while the dog sleeps on the couch and Christmas music plays softly

 

One More Netflix MUST SEE - Five Star Movie

Hubs and I just watched a wonderful movie on Netflix this afternoon. This is a movie I think every American should see, should be required viewing for every politician, every congressperson and all military personnel. 

This made me aware of the fact that our country is so close to going backwards while it has barely stepped forwards.

Six Triple Eight has left me practically speechless. It brought tears to my eyes more than once, more than twice, practically throughout the movie. Superb acting throughout. Excellent screen play, directing and filming. Kerry Washington and a great supporting cast.

If you watch anything on Netflix, put SIX TRIPLE EIGHT at the top of your list.

Some Wintertime Netflix Pics and Network TV

I started this post Tuesday but then I wasn't feeling well....Except for aches and pains that come with age, I haven't had so much as a cold or flu since 2019.  But my luck ran out (or I let my guard down) and tested positive for COVID yesterday after one really miserable night. Leon and I were very careful when traveling a month ago and always wore masks in the airports and on the plane. But I was getting over confident back here in New Mexico...even then I can't figure where I picked this up...an uncrowded restaurant? the grocery store? Friends? I was able to get the Paxlovid Rx yesterday and I am feeling tolerably miserable today.

And I just want to share this before getting to the main topic of my post. One of my favorite songs of all times performed by Garth Brooks and Trisha Yearwood at President Carter's funeral. How fitting and appropriate.

 

Anyhow here are a few suggestions for entertainment on cold winter evenings. All are on Netflix except Brilliant Minds on NBC network TV. I think some full seasons or episodes can be seen on YouTube.

KAOS - A very creative retelling of Greek mythology, set in modern, contemporary times. Defying Zeus is a theme here. The serious story plots are interspersed with macabre humor. No one seems able to escape their "prophesy" or their fate. The gods communicate with land line phones, the Furies ride motorcycles. If you know something about Greek mythology, you may find KAOS entertaining.

 

No Good Deed - House for Sale with secrets. The first few episodes are a bit slow and you're kind of like "Where is this going?" But it gets better.

 Man on the Inside - A little contrived but entertaining. No violence.

 

 The Diplomat - Suspenseful, good acting, international relations and political intrigue.

The Resident - Has to be one of the all time addictive medical soap operas. Blood gushing everywhere. Some very unlikely scenarios - like surgeons staffing the ER and preposterous medical procedures. Did I mention blood gushing everywhere and that it's addictive? We questioned our taste and sanity but couldn't stop watching. Interesting characters. Some socially redeeming story lines around serious issues.

White Collar - Convicted felon and white collar criminal Neil Caffrey (Matt Bomer) works with the FBI to catch other white collar criminals. The first few seasons are good but I kind of lost interest after a while.

 

Lincoln Lawyer - Some interesting story lines and good acting. Legal stuff that lawyers do (on TV). The trailer is not a very good sample:

 

 The Sinner  - I would call it a kind of dark investigative/mystery series. The first episode, from what I recall was a bit difficult to follow.

 

 Made in Italy - A "feel good" movie with nice scenery of the Tuscany region of Italy. I think the story has been done in various versions before.

Dark Winds - Intriguing, disturbing western native American crime series set in the 70s. The scenery is what I see every day so maybe that's part of what I find disturbing.

 

Network TV - Brilliant Minds - Somewhat eccentric Dr Wolf (Zachary Quinto) plays a gay doctor who along with his exceptional team of doctors diagnose and treat mysterious diseases and conditions with exceptional skill and sensitivity. Episode 7 was excellent. Hubby and I both cried.

 

 

Unfrosted - Don't waste your time. Competition between Kellogg and Post Cereal over Poptarts. Silly. Stupid.  Every possible cliche from the 50s and 60s. I fell asleep.

Some Past Recommendations:

I Care A Lot

Turn of the Tide

Nuovo Olimpo

Inventing Anna

Fire Rages in California.

 Incredible what's happening in California. Almost apocalyptic.

https://apnews.com/article/california-pacific-palisades-wildfires-los-angeles-4b67b7f29d0d6eb7321a52ef60c17d60

I Learned Somethings I Didn't Know About Italians and Their Relationship With the Catholic Church

 I didn't know the history of the Italian Unification vis-a-vis Rome and the Vatican. I did have a strong sense of both the secularization of Italy and it's underlying Catholic morality and this video is quite informative about these complex issues. 

Even though I'm American-Italian and over 70, I relate to the group of those who have become secularized.

My Holiday E-mail

Greetings to You and Your Loved Ones:

Just a note to wish you all a Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, Season’s Greetings, Happy New Year, Winter Solstice    ….and to let you know that even though we did not send out cards this year, Leon and I are alive and well (enough). We Thank you for your Cards and Holiday Wishes.

AGE catching up to me, Leon’s busy WORK schedule, and the general STATE of AFFAIRS, has made us both less inclined to engage in the HOLIDAY RITUALS…so we are having a very minimalist Christmas this year.  Even many of those traditional cookies and foods are missing from our house! (we are enjoying other people’s cookies however) We’ve made donations to the homeless shelter, LGBTQ non-profits and other charitable causes in lieu of gifts. Much less stressful and more in keeping with the Spirit of the Season.

The often mindless frenzy of the season as promoted by commercialism has always struck me as rather profane and a source of existential angst. I often find even the expectations based on religious or cultural tradition to be sometimes a source of stress and guilt rather than a source of joy and peace.

But I’ve always been a outlier, a reluctant rebel, a contrarian, a sceptic, proudly gay and mostly “woke.” And perhaps in my OLD AGE I am beginning to own those parts of me along with the aches and pains. 

Don’t get me wrong, I am, we are, Leon and I, also so GRATEFUL for all that we have: we are not lacking any necessities (there's at least one too many vehicles in the driveway), we have great FRIENDS and RELATIVES (you among them), wonderful MEMORIES (Leon has more memories than I do!) and just our being together, and, here in New Mexico lots of SUNNY DAYS (although we had a freak snow before Thanksgiving - 12 inches - see photo above) .

In all of that we find our JOY and PEACE.

Wishing JOY and PEACE to You, too.

While this missive is mostly “FRANK” 

“LEON” sends his LOVE as well.

Frank and Leon

P.S. I do not have email addresses for every family member or friend. Please pass on our Greetings to your loved ones and friends.

Baking Day

I must have had a few good hours of sleep last night because I was industrious today.

I made a double batch of Jim's Apple Muffins today and Italian Bread.

Apple muffins: 

    1 1/2 cups grated (McIntosh) apples 

Mix together:

    1 egg 

    1/2 cup milk 

    1/4 cup Crisco (or canola) oil  

Add the above to 

    1 1/2 cups flour

    1 cup sugar (I use 3/4 cup)

    2 tsp. baking powder

    1/2 tsp. salt

    1/2 tsp cinnamon (and a dash of pumpkin spice)

Mix until all is moist and put into 12 large muffin tins (or 2 small loaf pans)

Topping: 1/3 cup chopped walnuts, 1/3 cup sugar

Sprinkle topping on each muffin before baking

Bake at 400 F for 25 to 30 minutes (a bit longer for loaf pans)

 

 

And then there's the bread. Because there is no good Italian bread in New Mexico. So I have to make my own at least every two weeks.

 

Water, yeast, sugar, salt, flour.  

 

It's all the same.... but oh so different depending on hydration (proportion of flour to water), rise time, oven temperature, steam. This was one of my best crusty, light texture breads yet. High hydration. I think it was about 70% or slightly higher. A very soft sticky dough. Like focaccia or ciabotta dough. 

Leon and I already ate half a loaf.

A Re-Post From April 2011 - Still Despicable

 Going through some old posts and relegatingthem to the Draft category...for reasons...came across this:

Friday, April 8, 2011

Republicans are Just Too Despicable

I don't often do "political" commentary, but this is one of those occasions.

The Republicans in Congress are just too despicable for words.  Their tactics are nothing short of extortion, holding America hostage to their narrow minded religious ideology and their dangerous objective of destroying any and all government programs that serve ordinary people and the poor.   Yet they insisted on keeping tax cuts for the wealthy - tax cuts that just about every sane and reasonable person views as not only illogical, but counter-productive.

What is so difficult about balancing a budget: it takes both spending cuts and increasing revenue.  The Republicans want to do it only by cutting spending.  It doesn't work.

When you think how the wealthy not only get richer by the minute off the backs of the working poor and middle classes (whoever they are) and are also siphoning off wealth/dollars from the general economy, it is no wonder that there's not enough cash to run the country.  Couple that with the Bush era spending on war - spending that did not go into our economy but instead drained it,  it's no wonder there's no money to run the country.

The wealth  of the super-wealthy for the most part contributes nothing to the economy - they're certainly not spending it at "Mom and Pop" stores, at Sears, or in any significant amounts on American goods and services.  They "amass wealth" and "amass more wealth" but put nothing back.

Even a child playing Monopoly (if they still do) can tell you that if one player gets all the money and all the property the game is OVER - everyone loses.  There's no more fun to be had.  The real object of Monopoly is that the game goes on and on.  Taking all the money is subversive.

And the super-wealthy in these times are more than greedy, they are truly subversive.  And the Republicans are like ass-kissers hoping to get their payoff from these untouchables - those who, no matter how bad things get - never get touched by hard times.  The Republicans are deluded and delusional.  They are too despicable for words and just as subversive.

May they get their just rewards.

4 comments:

Russ Manley said...

Oh come on Frank - tell us how you *really* feel.

Grin.

And the working people just keep on voting for the fascist theives, time and time again. I suppose on the principle that it's not rape if you enjoy it, eh? Because God knows they certainly aren't getting a dime's worth of benefit for all their seig-heiling, are they?

All that's lacking here is a charismatic leader with nationwide appeal. Pray it doesn't happen.

PS - If you have Netflix, try FDR: American Experience (PBS show). He was up against *exactly* the same bloated moneyed interests in his day too. Exactly the same stuff was going on. And even St. Roosevelt couldn't do all that much to fight them. Plus ca change . . . .

April 8, 2011 at 11:16 PM

 Stan said...

Great post! What makes the Republicans and especially the Teabaggers so despicable, is that they were willing to shut down the government just to get rid of Planned Parenthood and the Environmental Protection Agency so corporations can dump as much crap into our waters and air as much as they please.
And if your so against abortion, shouldn't you support an organization that provides contraception? They make no sense.
Your absolutely right about the budget. You cannot sustain an economy or anything for that matter without more revenues coming in.
The tax cuts that the rich in this country keep getting to amass their wealth just infuriates me to no end.
I live in the suburbs near where some of the Wall Street'ers that commute from here in Jersey to Manhattan and I see the cars they drive and the McMansions they live in here in Middlesex and down in Monmouth and Ocean counties. Towns like Holmdel and Colts Neck. Let me tell you it's let the good times roll for them!

April 9, 2011 at 7:18 AM

Anonymous said...

Oh, yes, I agree with you 1,000%

saludos,
raulito

April 9, 2011 at 7:49 AM

Moving with Mitchell said...

So right. A friend of mine just commented on facebook: "Remember when teachers, public employees, Planned Parenthood, NPR and PBS crashed the stock market, wiped out half of our 401Ks, took trillions in TARP money, spilled oil in the Gulf of Mexico, gave themselves billions in bonuses, and paid no taxes? Yeah, me neither."

April 12, 2011 at 11:53 PM

World AIDS Day 2024

 President and Jill Biden will host a display of portion of the AIDS Quilt on the White House lawn today in commemoration of World AIDS Day. Of course this will not be a prominent news story today, and we should expect that World AIDS Day will never be mentioned again by the incoming administration for the next four years. This is the only "news" story I can find today:

https://youtube.com/shorts/s89I_1av-Ak?si=I_QRNIfqHfWsy-gw

And this short video about the Quilt: 

 

HIV/AIDS was, perhaps the only disease to be totally ignored by government and even "celebrated" by those who considered gays, sex-workers, drug users and other minorities sinful, deserving of a deadly disease and dispensable. It was, perhaps the first politically charged epidemic. 

And while HIV/AIDS is now largely a manageable infection, the disease of homophobia, bigotry and hate still rages unchecked.

Ordinarily....

 I would wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving with lots of Blah, blah, blah...

But I offer this instead:

 

OK, so here's a concession to tradition:

Terryville Turkeys

 

The Yin and the Yang: Glad Hubby Had a Nice Day; Me Not So Much

The YIN:

 Some photos hubby Ranger Leon sent from "The Office" today. Out with some co-workers patrolling the wilderness and a cave.

 The YANG:

Me, on the other hand, not so great. Still exhausted from four horrible nights of not sleeping due to pain of one limb or another, acid reflux (we went to a pot luck), phlegm in my throat, anxiety about not sleeping, etc.

So when my cousin called and asked how I was doing...I hesitated and she asked again. 

"Well, I'm just tired."

So she tried to be both sympathetic and dismissive.

"Yeah, I'm just so tired. Tired of everything. Haven't slept in four nights. And if you must know, just so tired of politics and the fucking republicans who are going to ruin this country. And we gays will all be marched off to concentration camps."

She tried being reassuring, puzzled about why I was so upset. And trying to tell me it couldn't be that bad. And asking where I am getting this from (like it is all left wing propaganda or something)

And I yelled at her telling her not to even try to argue with me. And more. But I won't bore you all with that.

Not feeling great about going off on her but we don't ever talk politics. She is, I believe, single issue, anti-abortion. So you know what that means. So I think I took the opportunity to attack her indirectly without accusing her of voting republican (though I'm pretty sure about that). 

Kind of like, "you'll see, just wait." I just will never understand the other side and how they justify their beliefs.

Update

 I updated that last post with the audio for "I hear the angels sing" with slide show.

Nostalgia Without a Real Theme

 Drove into town and back listening to some old songs on my thumb drive in the car. A whole bunch of memories and emotions.

Here is a sample of my playlist for today: (The video will auto-play the next song in the queue)

 

San Francisco - Scott McKenzie

California Dreamin' - Mamas and Papas

What A Fool Believes - The Doobie Brothers

Sounds Of Silence - Simon and Garfunkel

I've Never Seen Love Like This - Orpheus

Lay Down Candles In The Rain - Melanie

Look What They've Done To My Song Ma - Melanie

Poetry Man - Phoebe Snow

Under The Boardwalk - Rickie Lee Jones

Can't Find The Time To Tell You - Orpheus

Imagine - John Lennon

So In Love - k.d. lang

 

A Song by gay artist Jeff Krassner that I could not find on YouTube or anywhere on the internet so I will attempt to upload my own video:

“I Hear the Angels Sing”   Jeff Krassner

I can’t believe they don’t understand
‘bout the love I feel for you
When you touch me baby
I feel the angels sing

They tell me it’s wrong
That the devil is loose
They think he’s draggin’ us under
But they don’t have a clue

‘cause when you touch me baby
I hear the angels sing
And when you give yourself to me
Honestly, I hear the angels sing

What makes them think I would turn you away
In this world filled with madness and sorrow
I won’t sell my soul
Or hide any longer
I won’t love you in darkness
Just to make them feel stronger

‘cause when you touch me baby
I hear the angels sing
And when you give yourself to me
Honestly, I hear the angels sing

And you remind me that life can be sweet
Though the world says we don’t belong
So let them preach some old ancient rules
But I know in my heart
It’s the judgment of fools

‘cause when you touch me baby
I hear the angels sing
And when you give yourself to me
Honestly, I hear the angels sing
Over and over I hear the angels
Over and over I hear the angels
Over and over I hear the angels sing

__________________________________
A few more photos just for good measure and some lyrics from Melanie: 

 

 

 

Lay Down (Candles in the Rain)

Song by Edwin Hawkin Singers and Melanie

 

Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown
Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown

We were so close, there was no room
We bled inside each other's wounds
We all had caught the same disease
And we all sang the songs of peace

Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown
Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown

So raise the candles high
'Cause if you don't, we could stay black against the night
Oh, raise them higher again
And if you do, we could stay dry against the rain

Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown
Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown

We were so close, there was no room
We bled inside each other's wounds
We all had caught the same disease
And we all sang the songs of peace
Some came to sing, some came to pray
Some came to keep the dark away

So raise (raise) the candles high (up high)
'Cause if you don't we could stay black against the sky
Oh, oh, raise (raise) them higher again (up high)
And if you do, we could stay dry against the rain

Lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown
(You gotta) lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown

lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown
(Oh, you gotta) lay down, lay down, lay it all down
Let your white birds smile up at the ones who stand and frown

 

Look What They Did to My Song, Ma

Song by Melanie

 

Look what they've done to my song, ma

Look at what they've done to my song, ma

It was the only thing I could do half right
And it's turning out all wrong, ma, look
What they've done to my song

 

Look what they've done to my song, ma
Look what they've done to my song, ma
It was the only thing I could do half right
Turning out all wrong, ma
Look what they've done to my song

 

Look what they've done to my brain, ma
Look at what they've done to my brain
Well, they picked it like a chicken bone
And I think that I'm half insane, ma
Look what they've done to my song

 

Oh, I wish that I could find a good book to live in
Oh, I wish that I could find a good book
Well, if I could find a real good book
I'd never have to come out and look at
What they've done to my song

 

Ils ont changé ma chanson, ma
Ils ont changé ma chanson, ma
C'est la seule chose que je peux faire
Et ce n'est pas bon, ma
Ils ont changé ma chanson

 

But maybe, it'll all be all right, ma
Maybe, it'll all be okay
Well, if the people are buying tears
Then I'm gonna be rich girl some day, ma
Look what they've done to my song

Look what they've done to my song, ma-ma-ma
 

Look, look what they've done to my song
You know, they tied it up in a plastic bag
And then turned it upside down, oh ma-ma
Look at what they've done
Want to look at what they've done, oh ma-ma
Look what they've done to my song

 

I’m Tired

 I am going to try real hard to take a break from the news. I know it’s going to be difficult as I am a JMG addict. And forgive me if I’m not always checking in and or commenting on your blogs.

I’m certain there will be a resistance movement of some kind. I will assess at some point what part I can play in such a movement. One of my neighbors suggested we take down our rainbow flag, which flies prominently at our front entrance. I said no NEVER. 

I may be taking a break, but I am not retreating or God forbid going back in the closet.

Be well  RESIST. 

One of Many Analyses

From the Hawkeye Beacon: This post-election analysis is from Professor Christopher Robichaud, Senior Lecturer in Ethics and Public Policy, Harvard: “I'll say this, and then I likely won't be saying much more on here for quite some time, to the relief of some, I'm sure. But my farewell warning is this. Everyone in the days and weeks ahead will use this loss as an opportunity to seek validation for their own hobby horse complaint. Harris lost because she campaigned with Liz Cheney. Harris lost because she didn't embrace Gaza. Harris lost because she didn't choose Shapiro. Harris lost because she wasn't progressive enough (possibly my favorite one). Take a good hard look at the map, my friends. Trump has won the popular vote. Trump ran the table. Explaining that with your hobby horse issue isn't going to cut it, tempting and consoling as it may be. The problem isn't the electoral college. The problem isn't that we didn't have a full primary. The problem isn't Harris. The problem isn't that Dems didn't have the right message. The problem isn't even inflation or the border. The problem is so much worse than any of those things. Those are all technical problems, with straightforward expertise fixes. If only it were so! No, our problem is not technical. It's very much adaptive. A party that embraced the Big Lie, supported an insurrection, and has been selling conspiracy-addled madness for years was widely and enthusiastically embraced. Voter turnout was profound! People didn't sit this out. Simply put, the problem--as some of you have rightly posted--is cultural. America, culturally, has completely abandoned a politics of decency and respect and has embraced instead a politics of resentment, revenge, false nostalgia, and bullying. And if you look at the demographics, you also won't be able to comfort yourself that it's just a white thing, or a working class thing, or an education thing. It's multi-class, multi-gender, multi-educational and multi-racial. That's what winning the popular vote means. That's what running the table amounts to. A culture that has descended to this level of debasement is not easily fixed. In fact it may not ever be fixed. The timeline for changing something like this is decades--at best--not two-to-four year election cycles. You can extend that in this case, because with the GOP likely controlling all branches of federal government and the courts, they will ensure that mechanisms are in place to keep them in power long after their popularity has waned. You can count on that. The GOP evolved into a party of rage, lies, and revenge--and it correctly diagnosed that there was and is a large appetite for that. That's what the country wants. At least, enough of the country wants it to ensure broad appeal and widespread electoral success. The old GOP will never return, and the Dems have nothing to say to American culture at the moment. Nothing. They've been speaking to a country that's gone, like dust in the wind. And that's my final thought, which my posts last night alluded to. The America I knew and loved is gone. This new America--nah, I won't even bother. I will say that cultural change is less likely to occur in politics, or in the academy. You're not going to get people to see how vulgar they've become through a clever argument or a nice campaign speech, that's for sure. This would be time for the arts, broadly understood, to step in. The arts can change hearts and minds. Too bad the arts have been systematically dismantled in education in this country, and on the other end, the tech industry's assault on the arts through AI is sure to hollow out any good-faith efforts that might emerge. And for the rest of the world, America's rightward lurch is, I'm afraid, bad news for you too. I know you know this. Because it's not isolated, is it? It's just at the moment the most prominent example of a burgeoning trend. And this will embolden others in other countries, to be sure. We need not speculate what happens when countries become mired in lies, embrace resentment, and savor bullying. We know exactly what happens. Bloody conflict and global destabilization. The first quarter of the 21st century will therefore in hindsight be viewed as the seed-planting stage for the absolute shit show that's about to unfold globally over the next two and a half decades. Count on it. Adopt whatever coping and endurance strategies you have available. You're going to need it. I think that's all I've left to say.”

Still Grieving

I feel like my guts have been torn out. 

I remember the four years of horror and the next four will likely be worst for so many of us: women, immigrants, gays, lesbians, transexuals, democrats, sick, elderly, children, the poor,...

His list is long and the authors of Project 2025 are salivating. Ready to destroy everything we have fought for.

As a gay man I am terrified of what could happen to us. I am still in denial, still hoping for some miracle; a "deus ex machina" like in Greek tragedies.

Leon and I fantasize about Biden resigning and letting Harris become President #47, if only for a short time. Perhaps she will have a plan and she will have "IMMUNITY" to carry it out. To save the country. I want desperately for all of us to RESIST but I don't know how to go about doing that.

Back in the day we marched and protested. I'm not sure I have the energy to do that. Or whether marching and protesting will really make any difference now. Amen.

A Diversion

 I guess we needed this diversion to keep our minds off of other things. Leon and I just got finished shoveling our driveway and clearing off the cars so that he could get to work. And now our power is out in our town.

Yes I Know

 Me Too

One Last Thing

 Click to enlarge

Lots of Rocks and Vanished Memories

 Whenever we have guests from out of state we like to take them to see Leon's "Office" in the New Mexico wilderness. We spent the day on Saturday wandering around BLM land in the high desert. Lots of Rocks. Some scenes may look familiar as I've posted similar photos before.

 

Cactus growing in the rock crevices

This is the area Leon calls "Mars" but perhaps "Moon" would also describe the terrain.

 

Leon overseeing his territory.

Later that evening we dragged out some old VCR video tapes that we hadn't looked at since they were filmed in 1993. 

We were on a trip to California to visit a friend Tommy and as the movie unfolded with views of the California coast Leon and I were both puzzled by our complete lack of recognition of what we were seeing. 

Neither of us recognized the location, the buildings, the scenery, or the entire experience itself.

I swore that I was not actually there, that Leon must have gone alone...but he didn't recall any of the scenes depicted in the video either... until I heard my voice on the tape and soon enough, my own image!

How is it possible that such a trip that we took together in 1993 has been erased from our memory? 

We did recall some of the events that occurred later in the video, but without the details that we were seeing. 

We did remember that we rented a car in California and drove to Arizona and the Grand Canyon. I will not forget my experience of seeing the Grand Canyon early in the morning just after sunrise before any crowds had arrived.

But so much of the rest of the trip...Vanishing memories...scary. 

Stills from the video on our TV:

Me

Leon

Leon

Me

Me