Memorial Service and Mexican Food

 Hubs and I went to a memorial service of a friend today. He was just nine months older than me. He and his husband had been together for 46 years. It was love at first sight for both of them. He had been married to a woman prior to meeting his husband and had children. His ex-wife and children remained a part of his and his husband’s life as did his grandchildren, nieces and nephews and great-grand children.

He had a business for many years, was a hospice volunteer during the height of the AIDS crisis, worked with special education students and made friends in many places throughout the country. We did not know them when they were young and I would not have recognized either of them from the old photos being shown on the monitor above the remains at the funeral chapel.

There were 75 or more people at the memorial. Several offered eulogies. Seems everyone loved, cherished and admired him. If they had been Catholics, they would have made him a Saint right then and there.

I could not help but imagine my own memorial (which I hope not to have). There might be a handful of friends, maybe a relative or two. I’ve never been that close to my brother (we are 6 years apart) or with my niece and nephew, for whatever reason. My parents and sister, aunts and uncles and many of my cousins are deceased.

I’m not sure who would eulogize me, perhaps my husband, brother or an acquaintance. They would use words like: “too sensitive” “cranky” “stubborn” “hot-headed” “anxious” “bipolar” “reclusive” “quick to curse and swear” “hated crowds” “hates talking on the phone” “impatient” “opinionated” “hates Mexican food”.

They would struggle to find some positive attributes: “a pretty good husband” “a good cook” “an interesting sense of humor” “a good writer” “liked the beach and the ocean” and would try to make my work history sound better by not mentioning the quits and fireds: “worked with children with behavioral problems” “worked in HIV/AIDS health care” “ran a group for LGBTQ young people” “wrote grants for nonprofits”.

All in all they would be remembering me in all my earthy, irreverent humanity, not as a saintly person who had led a particularly “heroically virtuous life, or martyred for the faith, or worthy of imitation.”
So the memorial was not only thought provoking for me but, as I am just about at the edge of the grave myself, somewhat personally depressing.

To make matters worse we were all invited to a restaurant for luncheon buffet: chicken and beef enchiladas, rice, beans, sopapillas. The sopapillas were ok.

Our Next President?

 https://youtube.com/live/MCc-ipWVShY?si=RJG_KWmcZ1AqGuZr

Country Joe Dead at 84 "What Are We Fightin' For?"

 Country Joe has died at age 84 from complications of Parkinson's. Condolences to all his family and friends everywhere.

I can't say he or the Fish were among my favorite singers back in the 60s but I do remember his anti-war protest song. Now the regime is hinting at reinstating the draft so this will be relevant once again.

 In the spirit of the song and it's anti-establishment rhetoric, I've taken some liberty to update "Vietnam" to "old Iran" "commie" to "Jihadi".  We are back to where we started...but worse.

Well come on all of you big strong men, Uncle Sam needs your help again,
he got himself in a terrible jam, way down yonder in OLD IRAN,
put down your books and pick up a gun, we're gunna have a whole lotta fun.

CHORUS
and its 1,2,3 what are we fightin for?
don't ask me i don't give a damn, the next stop is OLD IRAN
and its 5,6,7 open up the pearly gates. 

Well there aint no time to wonder why...WHOPEE we're all gunna die.

now come on wall street don't be slow, why man this's war a-go-go,
there's plenty good money to be made, supplyin' the army with the tools of the trade,
just hope and pray that when they drop the bomb, they drop it on the OLD IRAN.

CHORUS

now come on generals lets move fast, your big chance is here at last.
nite you go out and get those guys cuz the only good Jihadi is one that's dead,
you know that peace can only be won, when you blow em all to kingdom come.


CHORUS

now come on mothers throughout the land, pack your boys off to OLD IRAN
come on fathers don't hesitate, send your sons off before its too late,
be the first one on your block, to have your boy come home in a box

CHORUS  

There’s No Re-wind.

And there's also this tidbit about Hegseth's religious warmongering:

U.S. Troops Were Told Iran War Is for “Armageddon,” Return of Jesus

 https://jonathanlarsen.substack.com/p/us-troops-were-told-iran-war-is-for?utm_medium=ios

Back So Soon?

 I guess I will have to eat my words now because I think this is too good not to pass on. 

Never say never.

 

And for some contrast, I will share these thoughts: 

We watched “The Golden Girls 40 Years of Laughter and Friendship” last night. It was an ABC special that we TiVo-ed when it aired back in November I believe. It actually brought tears to my eyes and not from laughter.

What I was feeling was grief. Not necessarily grief for the loss of the wonderful women who stared in the show, but more for the times in which the show took place. We were fighting for our rights and freedom and our lives - and we were invincible and strong and steadfast. And as difficult as things were for us and others we were winning and making progress. We were high on our pride and confidence.

Today is dark with an evil my generation has not seen, not even during the height of the AIDS crisis and there certainly was evil directed at us then.

Today we are on the verge of losing it all.

I grieve for what we have already lost; I grieve for those happier times and the laughter; and I grieve for what is being destroyed by our own government. I grieve for the loss of innocence and safety and reality as we knew it.

We have a disease that even the Golden Girls cannot cure.

Update

 I haven't been posting and my checking in on other blogs has been sporadic. Not for any particular reason except I probably spend too much time on JMG and YouTube and putting myself together in the morning. 

After the morning oblations and hearing aids and exercises for the knee and shoulder and whatever ails me at the moment (I am not one for exercises) and doctor, dentist, pharmacy trips and grocery shopping and cooking and laundry....And the fact that I've kind of run out of things to talk about: New Mexico is monotonous, and nothing of importance has happened (or if it did, it wasn't that interesting), family, food, friends, hubby, rants, politics, outrage, LGBTQ, even the trip to California this past September - I've been there, done that.  I've written it all before. 

To take it one step further, I'm going through Reluctant Rebel past posts from the oldest to newest, saving what I like in a separate file and reverting them all to "draft" status. Eventually I will probably be deleting the entire blog for good. Just so you won't wonder what happened to me...

There is a slogan that reminds hikers to "Leave No Trace".  As a hiker on this earth, I'm afraid that will be impossible, but as a hiker on this internet thing, perhaps I will leave behind fewer breadcrumbs and so be a bit harder to find.

I will leave you with this:

May we all survive the insanity of these frightening and horrific times. I appreciate all of you, your comments, your stopping by now and then, and visiting you on your own Blogs. 

Thank you all and PEACE, my friends.