Friday, October 19, 2007


Choosing a name for this new blog was worse than the grocery store dilemma of "paper or plastic"

Reluctant – feeling or showing no willingness or enthusiasm to do something, unwilling, unenthusiastic, disinclined, hesitant…lots of negatives, describes me too well; the definition should be no enthusiasm to do anything…I think I was born kicking and screaming and I’ll probably die that way. When I was exploring career possibilities, which I’ve been doing for 37 years, I used the process of elimination: I eliminated everything. Still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up. I really am enthusiastic about doing something – I just haven’t figured out what it is.

Rebel – somebody who rejects the codes and conventions of society…who defiantly protests against authority, radical, dissenter…at first glance “rebel” and “reluctant” seem contradictory. But they’re really not that dissimilar. Except for the fact that to be a rebel requires at least some enthusiasm or willingness to behave defiantly. Is a reluctant rebel merely passive aggressive? I marched. I protested. I carried signs. I purposely avoided getting arrested on purpose. I was chicken.

I can find lots to rebel against, but ah, one worries about having health insurance coverage. Maybe I’m a just a gutless tool.

Hey, I had to choose a name for this blog, and that one was available. Something with the word “Troll” in it was a contender, but I’m reluctant to take on the cause of rebellious trolls.

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